My husband won’t have sex with me: The man is a woman like the others, and sometimes he does not want to make love.Catherine Solano, sexologist you decodes the reasons for the drop in your partner’s libido.

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My husband won't have sex with me: What you can do
My husband won’t have sex with me: What you can do

My husband won’t have sex with me: Sexual dysfunction

Erectile disorder and premature ejaculation are frequent brakes to men’s desire. Even occasional, these malfunctions prevent your partner from feeling fulfilled in sexual intercourse. The fear of disappointing you will be stronger than her desire and desire to have sex with you. He will do everything to avoid them and to face his problems.
Whether they are occasional or long-term, these disorders can be regulated and cured by specific medications or physical exercises.

What you can do: in a couple, it is always essential to communicate, recalls the sexologist Catherine Solano. Even if this topic is complicated and sensitive, try to analyze whether this problem is recent, exceptional or if it is long-term. Try to de-dramatize, to strengthen your partner, to propose sexual relations without penetration to reassure him. If the disorders are deeper, it is essential that your partner goes to see a specialist.

Fatigue and stress

Men can also be tired! Moreover, the drop in energy harms their sexuality and libido. Stress and anxieties can also block your man’s desire.

What you can do: Catherine Solano recommends that you never lose physical contact with your partner. If your partner is tired, why not pamper him, pet him, give him pleasure, cuddle him … Rest assured, after a few nights rest, your partner will have regained his libido and energy to fill you with pleasure. If fatigue persists, it is recommended to consult a doctor. If your partner is stressed, listen to his problems, but out of the bedroom. Your bed should remain a place of pleasure, comfort, and desire.

Medication and Disease

Depression is the leading cause of decreased libido in humans. However, it can also cause erectile dysfunction, and inability to achieve orgasm. Taking certain medications often has the side effect of decreased seeing loss of sexual desire.

What you can do: ask your partner to see a specialist and the doctor to change the treatment.

Negative emotions

Sometimes negative emotions (jealousy, anger, sadness, irritation …) are stronger than desire. If your partner feels resentful towards you, it will be more closed, and will not want to communicate with you, even in a sexual way.

What you can do: if you know your partner well, and find the reasons for this irritation, quickly de-escalate the situation so that it does not become inflamed. Above all, do not include yourself in a position of rejection. You would enter a vicious circle.

The demotivation

In a couple, there are two! Man does not necessarily have to be the motor of your sexuality. Your demotivation may have discouraged it in the long run. Your refusals may have succeeded in lowering your libido. Your lack of interest in sex can also generate lassitude and a growing lack of desire.

What you can do: take initiatives. Tell your partner your wish, show him your desires and jump him on! During your sexual intercourse, be communicative, and express your pleasure. Your libido and his will be in the real state, and your sexual relations will be once again flourished and balanced.

Lack of love

Vote partner no longer seems to have any desire for you. You wonder if his decline in desire is not due to a lack of love. Catherine Solano reminds us that ” if your partner does not like you anymore if he breaks away from you, this lack of desire will be part of a more global negative behavior .”

Lack of self-confidence

Without you realize, maybe you have during your sexual intercourse induced a form of castration, imposed a desire for performance, communicated negative reflections, criticized your hugs. The sexologist Catherine Solano reminds us that ” all these situations lead to a loss of confidence in your partner and a fear of not being up to the task. So a rejection of sexual intercourse “.

What you can do: If there is a register where the notion of performance should never appear, it is sexual relations. You trade with a partner and not with a performer. In your couple, be in search of trust, shared pleasure, exchange and physical attachment. Orgasm will follow, and sexual relations will also flourish.

An abuse of pornography

According to the sexologist Catherine Solano, the overconsumption of porn is not necessarily good for the sex of a couple. Indeed, too much pornography distorts the vision of sexuality. If your partner is abusing porn, “normal” sexual intercourse will no longer make him want; he will need strong stimuli to fuel his desire. Moreover, if the pornographic wave induces new experiments, more “liberated,” it can also reinforce the anguish of performance of the men.
What you can do: Even if the subject is tricky, try to understand your partner’s motivation to watch porn movies (why not watch one with him?) And try to restore carnal and sexual contact in your couple.

Your partner has deviant sexual practices

Your partner may love you, but his sexuality is different. Catherine Solano explains that “if your partner is paraphilic, he can not have sexual desire other than in the context of his perversion (sadomasochism, fetishism, voyeurism …).

What you can do: not much … unless you have the same sexual perversions.

We recommend reading the article: How to give yourself an orgasm

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