Gender: 10 answers to the 10 most embarrassing questions!
Talking about orgasms, libido, and STIs can be intimidating. Here are our experts’ answers to the ten most embarrassing questions about sex.
Question # 1: Why do men always fall asleep after making love?
Answer: “In humans, the body’s chemical balance changes after orgasm,” says David McKenzie, a Vancouver-based sex therapist. It releases prolactin, a biochemical substance that has the effect of giving it a feeling of great fatigue. ”
Mark Leyner and Billy Goldberg, doctors and authors of Why Do Men Fall Asleep After Sex? , Put forward another explanation. “It is thought that the high physical expenditure during the sexual act and at the moment of orgasm exhausts the glycogen stores of the muscles, substance that provides them with their energy. As men have more muscle mass than women, they feel more tired than they are, “the latter said. The two doctors point out that although one can not explain with certainty their need to sleep after love, oxytocin, prolactin, gamma-aminobutyric acid (GABA) and endorphins are certainly for something.
In sum, if he falls asleep every time you have sex, it does not necessarily mean that your relationship lacks solidity or intimacy, or that he does not like you.
Question # 2: Why do I always have more libido than my partner?
Answer: You are part of a significant minority of women who are sexually more motivated than their spouse. There are women in their forties who are going through a period of liberation from their sexual energy. At this point in their lives, they discover that they can free themselves from the constraints of their mind and let their sexual desire express themselves entirely. They are conscious of having more experience, confidence and sex appeal, which has the effect of removing the concerns that constitute a hindrance to sexuality. When this happens, be careful! These women do not wait to be in the right mood; they only take action.
So, yes, you are normal, your high libido indicates that you are healthy and have enough balance to let your sexual desire express itself despite the stress of everyday life.
Question # 3: Why is my libido still so low?
Answer: In medicine, we have a rule: always check if the causes have a physical origin. If your sexual appetite decreases, talk to your doctor and ask if you should take a blood test to check your hormones and rule out certain diseases such as anemia or diabetes. Moreover, if you do not feel well physically, it is plausible that you have little interest in the sexual thing. If you have started quarantine, it is entirely possible that the hormones are involved; Ask your doctor to refer you to a specialist in this area. However, one thing is sure, the hormonal condition changes every decade, well before menopause.
Question # 4: Am I addicted to sex?
Answer: When sex encroaches on everyday activities and guides your life, there is cause for concern. High sexual activity does not necessarily mean sexual dependence. “The keywords to determine if there is a problem are a compulsion and obsession. When one enters a mode where sexuality becomes a loophole, there, one must be worried, “says the clinical sexologist, Julie Pelletier.
Question # 5: Should I consult a sexologist?
Answer: Inability to achieve orgasm, erectile problems, pain during sexual intercourse … All these ailments can have serious repercussions on your life as a couple. Sitting with a specialist can help you identify dysfunctional elements and provide you with solutions. Couples who consult are often out of breath and on the verge of separation but do not wait to reach the breaking point to seek help. Time rarely arranges things. The longer you wait, the more it becomes embarrassing to talk with your partner. To find a sexologist in your area, visit the Association of Sexologists of Quebec (ASQ).
Question # 6: Why are my sexual relationships painful?
Answer: Vulvodynia is a condition that often manifests itself with persistent pain for no apparent reason. It affects women of all ages, with or without a sexual history. This condition is rarely treated quickly, and it is deplorable that it remains misdiagnosed by doctors. “A woman struggling with the syndrome must see several doctors before finding one that can care for it,” says Dr. Andrew Goldstein, one of North America’s foremost specialists on the subject. A gynecologist practicing in the United States who run centers specializing in vulvovaginal disorders. Diagnosing vulvodynia is no simpler than establishing the causes of a headache or foot, These painful states often having multiple origins and treatments. Possible causes include hormonal changes, pelvic muscle contraction and nerve problems.
Question # 7: How do I achieve orgasm?
Answer: Studies show that about 15% of women are anorgasmic (inability to reach orgasm ), and another 15% have very rarely. Moreover, you, like all women, can learn to achieve orgasm. I do not advise women to aim only for orgasm. However, many anorgasmic women have never taken the time to discover what excites them. Moreover, much of the female orgasm is psychological: to reach it, it needs to calm its mind, feel safe and relaxed. This is why the path to pleasure must begin with you. Start by telling your partner that you have never had an orgasm. You must also tell her that you want to improve your sex life. Then, When you have time alone, explore the stimulation of your clitoris by yourself using your fingers. Then invite your husband to participate in your masturbation. Do not be afraid to show her how to touch you with her fingers, her tongue or a sex toy; Most men like to give pleasure to their wife.
Question # 8: How do I find my G-spot?
Answer: “We believe that the G-spot is in the anterior part of the vaginal cavity [the closest part of the abdomen ], rather than the vaginal wall,” says researcher Beverly Whipple, co-authors of the book The G Spot and Other Discoveries about Human Sexuality , which is still amazed at the widespread confusion about this region. We can now explain how some women come to experience a great feeling of pleasure by stimulating the anterior wall of the vaginal cavity.
Question # 9: Could sex relieve headaches?
Answer: If you have already avoided sex because you had a headache, note that, according to a scientific study that has been interested in this topic, sexual activity can help relieve pain. Of the patients who had sex while suffering from a migraine, 60% reported feeling less pain. (37% of patients with Horton’s headache felt an improvement.) Although it may be believed that sex is merely a distraction from pain, researchers explain that other reasons are possible, such as Endorphins, changes in blood pressure and post-orgasmic relaxation. Whatever the reason, it is worth trying, right?
Question # 10: Do exercises and sex work?
Answer: “Exercise can do a lot for your libido, ” says Lori Brotto, director of the UBC Sexual Health Lab in Vancouver. ” Body image, mood and physical health are critical for sexual desire in women, much more than the influence of hormones.” Because female desire is an emotional response rather than a reaction of the body. So when a woman feels good emotionally, she is more likely to be a bad mood.
“When I exercise, I feel confident, secure and much more interested in getting in touch with someone. I find that exercise increases my libido, “says Carlyle Jansen, a sexual educator and founder of the Good For Her erotic shop in Toronto.